Oh no! Britain in crisis... over change in recipe for Creme Eggs
There is one piece of news that appears to be causing widespread hysteria across Britain.
There are plenty of horrific and outrageous incidents around the world. Crimes against humanity that have spurred protests and marches against injustice and intolerance.
But going by the British press, the UK is far more concerned that Cadbury Creme Eggs - renowned sickly sweet Easter treats - are undergoing a recipe change.
All for a chocolate egg.
If you're not familiar with it, these confections are chocolate eggs filled with a gooey yellow and white fondant.
They thick shell is usually made with Cadbury Dairy Milk chocolate.
Cadbury are replacing it with "standard, traditional Cadbury milk chocolate", said the spokesman.
Creme Eggs are a seasonal treat, only sold around Easter time. For those that wait for the eggs to come around, the change in recipe is the worst news imaginable.
We absolutely feel for these poor, deprived souls who have clearly set their priorities in life...
Sure, the spokesman added that the Creme Egg will remain "exactly the same". But will it really be the same?
If you can stand to read more, this is what she said:
"We have always used a range of milk chocolate blends for different products, depending on their shape or consistency. The fundamentals of the Cadbury Crème Egg remain exactly the same -- delicious milk chocolate and the unique creme centre that consumers love."
To add insult to injury, the new Creme Eggs taste bad.
A taste review for the Birmingham Mail was rather concisely titled "I wouldn't inflict it on my worst enemy" . It received other comments such as "absolutely disgusting" and "vile".
But there is light at the end of this dark tunnel. Singaporeans looking to buy Creme Eggs need not worry - the recipe change is only effective in the United Kingdom.
Oh you poor Britons, how will you survive?
Source: The Guardian, BBC, Birmingham Mail